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A bride-to-be is considering excluding her parents from her wedding and completely uninviting them to her big day.
Looking for validation, the Reddit user detailed their predicament in the popular thread, “Am I The A**hole?” And while they might’ve had second thoughts about telling their parents they couldn’t attend their nuptials at first, other Redditors confirmed they made the right decision.
The candid individual started by explaining how long they’ve been with their significant other.
“Me and my girlfriend just got engaged after almost nine years of dating and are planning on having our wedding spring of next year,” they wrote. “With this we have begun planning the wedding and one of the topics that came up was if we want kids at our wedding.”
Because they’re both the oldest in their families, they landed on the decision to not have any kids under the age of 10 at their wedding reception to keep a “more adult style.” Unfortunately, this upset the bride’s mother.
The Reddit user admitted: “When mentioning this to my mother she was not happy with the decision we made as some people will have to leave early because of the no kids rule.”
“There are three families that are invited that have kids under 10 with a total of seven kids under 10 years old,” they continued. “Me and my fiancé were expecting at least one of the parents if not both from each family to leave early to take care of their kids and were completely ok with this as they have other responsibilities to tend to.”
However, this prompted their mother and father to organise a separate reception for all the parents who had to leave early for their kids, and of course, that means they would be skipping out on the actual reception too.
“With this she is telling most of the guest from her side of the family (about 50 of the 125 invited) that they should come to her party instead of the reception,” the Redditor explained. “After hearing this from her we got into a heated argument, with her saying she is doing what she feels is right and doesn’t need my permission to throw a celebration.”
The conversation allegedly ended with the upset daughter agreeing that their mother and father didn’t need permission to throw their own celebration, but they, therefore, didn’t have to come to the ceremony. Additionally, the Reddit user told their parents that they should be supporting their kid’s wishes.
They added: “This is very difficult for me to accept as I have always imagined my parents being there on my wedding day but at the same time we do not want her there if she is just going to leave early to go party somewhere else and try to take half of our guests with her.”
The Redditor then asked for feedback from other anonymous users. Most individuals noted how they thought the bride-to-be had done the right thing and was valid in being upset.
“Your mother is intentionally trying to sabotage your wedding out of spite because you don’t want children at your wedding,” one passionate person proclaimed.
Another said: “Think of it as an opportunity to save some money. Don’t invite any of your moms friends or distant relatives that you think will go to your moms party. Heck have a much smaller wedding. And you already know this but your mother is crazy.”
“She’s shown you who she is and she’s helping you weed out the people who are only showing up to socialize. She’s mad because you are not subsidizing her play date. Only invite the people who love and support you,” a third supporter remarked.
One blunt person questioned: “Why are they invited in the first place? Sounds like a lot of people you should be cutting and saving money.”
“If you want them to come to your wedding, invite them regardless of your mother’s threats. Give them a chance to do the right, civil, and adult thing, please don’t assume they’ll all spurn you because your mother has forgotten her manners,” one kind indivdual suggested.
A perplexed Reddit user simply said: “This is the weirdest wedding concept I’ve heard in a while.”